I’m not sure if any of you have had a bad customer service experience lately, but it seems like I’ve been a lightening rod for people who don’t care about me or my needs. Today was no exception. I was arguing on the phone with a customer service representative (CSR), and I became incensed over my rights as a customer. Have any of you had this type of experience or is it just me?

The CSR put me on hold, and I had a few moments to calm down. My first thought was, “What am I doing?” and the second thought was, “What kind of ambassador am I for Christ?”

I took a deep breath, and wondered what the CSR would think if she knew I was a Christian? That immediately humbled me. I’m supposed to be a representative for Jesus, an Ambassador to the world. And I’m having a meltdown because something didn’t go my way.

As a Christian, I’m supposed to exhibit love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). In my five-minute conversation with a stranger, I was anything but kind, gentle, and in control. Once again, I failed.

But then…I remembered who I am. (Remember the Week 30 blog?) God is using me to reach other people just like me. “So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, “Come back to God!” (2 Corinthians 5:20)

I may have failed in my five minute conversation this afternoon, but God always gives us other opportunities to share his message. I’m not perfect, but the good news is that God doesn’t expect me to be perfect, just obedient. I think that’s good news for all of us.

Sometimes I just don’t understand the men in my life. They are much more complex than women. They can spend hours by themselves playing a game, work for hours without eating a single morsel, and can have a five-minute conversation that for them seems like an eternity. Can anyone relate?

Last week I searched scripture to find out how God sees women. This week I wanted to know how God views men, so I went to our Instruction Manual (the Bible) for answers. What I found didn’t surprise me, and it did give me an opportunity to see how God rests so much responsibility on the shoulders of our men. For example:

Men must be strong, yet loving. In 1 Corinthians 16:13-14, the verses say, “Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.”

Men are expected to provide for their families. They are expected to work for a living, and provide for relatives who are unable to care for themselves. In 1 Timothy 5:8, the verse says, “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”

Men are expected to love their wives as much as Christ loved us by giving his very life (Ephesians 5:25). To me, that means my husband should love me unconditionally, and be willing to sacrifice his life for mine.

Men who desire to be leaders in the church should be above reproach, faithful to his wife, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, and not a lover of money (1 Timothy 3:2-3).

Men were made to be leaders, protectors, and providers. Sometimes I don’t give my menfolk enough credit for being who they were created to be. This gives me a new appreciation for the men that I hold dear: my husband, father, son, son-in-law, brother, and grandson. I know you have men that you love, too. Join me this week as we celebrate the men in our lives and appreciate how and why we were created differently.

This past week has felt more like a soap opera than real life. And today, I felt like a needed a reminder of how God sees me, rather than how I see myself. My blog may be a bit long this week, but perhaps we all need a reminder of how powerful, beautiful, and whole we are through Christ.

• God loves me so much that he made me a co-heir with Christ. Imagine inheriting a part of God’s assets! How awesome is that? Romans 8:16-17 says, “The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.”
• I don’t have to worry or be anxious about my future, because God has it all under control. He’s given me my skills, talents, and abilities. Any plan I could create would be inferior to his. Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
• God sees me as a precious daughter, someone to be treasured. Proverbs 31:10 says, “An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.”
• Older women have a responsibility to encourage young women. What better purpose could I ask for? I love nothing more than encouraging my daughter and granddaughters. I also loved mentoring the younger women at work. Titus 2:3-5 says, “Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.”
• What I see in the mirror doesn’t reflect what God sees when He looks at me. I find that to be lifesaving and comforting. He doesn’t compare me to others, or expect me to be more than I am. Psalm 139:14 says, “I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.”

The Bible is full of other wonderful examples of how God sees us—I just chose a few. But he loves me enough to adopt me, to be one of his many heirs. I can rest assured in my future, because I know God has a plan for my life. I’m so precious to him that I’m incomparable to anything in this world. God sees me as perfect, someone to be treasured and loved. And do you know what the best news is? He sees you the same, exact way.

I have many regrets, but the one that I really can’t shake is not living my life as a Christian sooner. I think about the lost time I spent chasing after the all-American dream and it makes me sad. I think about not taking our children to church or praying for loved ones, and I feel empty. I think about where our family would be today if only I’d come to Christ 20 years earlier, and I feel lost.

But these are just feelings. I put my trust in God, and I know his timing is perfect. Not my timing—His. And there is certainly a plan in place that I don’t necessarily have to understand. In Ephesians 5:15-16, the Bible says, “Look therefore carefully how you walk, not as unwise, but as wise; redeeming the time, because the days are evil.” The translation for redeeming in this passage means to buy up, ransom, to rescue from loss. I don’t know about you, but I need to rescue my time from loss because I’ve already “lost” enough time.

And if I think about my time rather than feel, I know the timing was perfect. I have so much to share with other women…I’ve made so many mistakes, I can relate to women on so many levels. And perhaps that’s my ministry. My ability to talk and empathize with women. If the price I paid for this was 20 years, then it was well worth it.

I look at my children, and I’m so proud of the adults they’ve become in spite of me. And I have God to thank for that, too.

From this day forward, I’ll be rescuing my time from loss. I plan to do the work God has planned for me, and trust that he knows my heart and my passions. I hope he uses my time and talents for His work, and at the same time fulfill some of my own personal desires.

Deuteronomy 6:5 says it best, “Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.” Words to live by, right?

Today we’re hosting a get-together with our volunteer team from Celebration Church. Believe it or not, Mark and I don’t know all the members of our team, and this will be a perfect opportunity to spend the evening with friends and to make new ones.

Hebrews 10:24-25 says, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”

I know I could call each and every one of you if I needed encouragement or a shoulder to cry on. But according to the instruction manual (the Bible), we’re also called upon to meet together to spur one another toward love and good deeds. I’m only speaking for myself, but I rarely think about doing good deeds when I’m enjoying the company of my girlfriends! The conversation usually revolves around family, fashion, and fun!

Perhaps that’s why this in in the Bible. Left to my own propensity, I might think about doing a good deed for someone. But think about what good we could do corporately! This week, I plan to think about how I can make a difference in someone’s life. And if I can make a difference, perhaps a few of us working together can make a huge difference in our community. I would love to hear God tell me, “Well done, good and faithful servant!”

Can we take a moment to pray for the families of the fallen officers in Dallas?

Every time I hear of an officer who has been killed in the line of duty, I think of Jeff, my son-in-law, who serves and protects in Fresno. Night after night Jeff goes on duty, and I’ve never asked him why. I can’t imagine all the horrors he faces as he deals with drug addicts, prostitutes, gang bangers, victims of domestic violence, etc. But I do know that God is with him.

Romans 13:1-5 lays it all out. God establishes governing authorities, including police officers. Whoever rebels against these authorities are rebelling against God. Police officers are agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. (I’ve placed the entire text of Romans 13:1-5 to read for yourself). After reading this scripture, I feel so sad for those people who don’t realize how big our God is.

About 13 years ago, I had an opportunity to do a ride-along with a police officer as part of a Citizens Academy in Fresno. We started about 9 p.m. and it was exciting—at first. Then we were called to check out a crack house in the Tower District. The officer thought I would be safer with him, so as he investigated the basement of this house with no electricity, I was right behind him. I was scared. I had no idea what we might find or who we might find. We did end up arresting someone at the scene, and I’ve never forgotten this experience. It gave me a whole new respect for the officers who are sworn to protect us.

According to some statistics, there are over 900,000 police officers nationwide. Almost one million men and women serve their local communities, yet we only hear about the ones who have abused their authority or those who have died in the line of duty.

Today, I’d like to thank all the police officers who go to work every day to protect our rights, our families, and our homes. But most of all, I’d like to thank Jeff. I’m so proud of him, so proud of the way he carries the added burden of responsibility. I’ve seen him come home after his shift and never have a cross word with his “girls.” I’m not sure if he knows God called him for this duty, but I hope to have that conversation with him soon.

As promised…

Romans 13:1-5, “Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and you will be commended. For the one in authority is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for rulers do not bear the sword for no reason. They are God’s servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also as a matter of conscience.”

I am officially at the midpoint of my promised 52 weeks of sharing my journey as a Christian woman. It sure doesn’t seem like it’s been 26 weeks!

I’ve shared my feelings, regrets, challenges, and victories with you, and I so appreciate you all! Thank you for taking the time to support me, to chime into my Facebook page, and for your prayers.

Back in Week 11, I talked about living victoriously, and I wrote, “Only I can take the step to living life like a warrior, and believing God to do the rest. I feel a bit mightier already.” I would like to think I’ve come a long way since Week 11, but to tell the truth, I’ve been feeling a bit defeated lately.

I know God has a plan for my life, and I’ve been anxious about that. I’m used to structure, to time pressures, to putting out fires, and living life exhausted. To put it another way, I’m trying to rush God. But His ways are far above my ways and I may be waiting awhile.

So, I started a bible study, “The Armor of God,” by Priscilla Shirer. I said I wanted to be a warrior, right? I thought I could use some new armor with my new warrior attitude. Picture every woman you know putting on the armor of God: the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, a shield of faith, the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit—which is the word of God.

I swear I just got shivers all over just thinking about the world as we know it being kicked on its ass as Christian women make a difference as a driving force in our communities. During the next few weeks, as I study Ephesians, I hope to be a bold prayer warrior for my family and friends—and that means you!

Phillip (my son) just celebrated his 37th birthday this past week. After all these years, I can still remember every detail of June 21. If we had been living in the 1800s, he and I would most likely be dead. By the time the doctor decided to do a C-Section, Phillip was in distress. Our little guy was purple by the time he was delivered, but he was perfect. I consider this Miracle #1 in my life.

If you’re a mother, I’m sure you remember every detail of giving birth to your first born. There’s just something about that first experience that imprints it on our memories forever.

But as mothers, our job doesn’t end there, does it? We get through the Terrible Twos, the Tween Years, the Teen Years, and then…ahhh—Adulthood. But we continue to worry and pray, because now their problems takes more than a band aid to fix.

About two years ago, I felt the urge to pray for Phillip in the mornings. So I’d get up before work to walk and pray. I used Psalm 1 as a foundation for my daily prayer. He never knew I was praying for him, and I’ll probably never know why I felt the urge to do so.

Sometimes all we can do is pray for our children. I’ve learned some truth in this past year. I can’t fix my problems or anyone else’s. What I can and should be doing is praying (talking) to God and asking for his help because He is my loving God and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield, in whom I take refuge, who subdues peoples under me (Psalm 144:2).

What more could I ask for than a loving God who has the power to protect my children? Not one darn thing!

This weekend I’d like to honor all the fathers I know and love, especially my own husband—Mark. Being a father doesn’t mean you have to be the biological donor at the time of conception. I’ve watched Mark for the past 26 years, and I admire him more than he’ll ever realize. He loves Phillip and Monica, and what more could a mother ask for? He adores his grandchildren, and just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes.

I’m sure the majority of you all have the same story, the same experience.

If you’re reading this and aren’t married or have children today, then I encourage you to honor your father this weekend, because nothing would bring him more happiness than to have a son or daughter acknowledge him for being a great dad.

I love the imagery of Psalm 127:3-5, “Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth.” A father has a huge responsibility, he can either aim true or aim wide. Haven’t we all experienced the exasperation of a father who sees his children off the trajectory of an arrow aimed true?

So today, I want to acknowledge my husband for all the hours he’s spent worrying about our children, for providing resources to raise them, for loving and nurturing them, and for the wisdom to know when to let our children soar like eagles—even when I didn’t think they were ready for leave the nest let alone fly solo.

I’m sure you’ll want to acknowledge the men in your life this weekend. So, here’s a toast to all the men who have loved and sacrificed for our children. Cheers!

I’ve been officially retired for four weeks, and I haven’t accomplished anything that I had planned. I haven’t written much, the junk drawer is junkier than ever, and the jaunt to the Fresno State Library for research purposes is still on the horizon. And…I have no one to blame but myself.

These past four weeks have been pure bliss—rest, relaxation, and taking care of family. But I can’t stop my nagging alter ego telling me that I must do something, I must have a schedule, and I must have something tangible to show for my time. The image of my time is like some old western movie where the Indians are sending smoke signals and puffs of gray smoke are rising to the heavens.

Today, as I sat at my computer, I thought of the song Turn! Turn! Turn! by The Byrds. (If you have no idea what I’m talking about, google it, go to iTunes, or read Ecclesiastes 3:1-8). I especially related to verse 1, “To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.”

All of us have different seasons that we go through, and to our great joy, everyone is different. God is brilliant—he knew that we would need to support each other as we move from season to season. That we could rely on friends who have paved the way for us, so our walk might be easier or help those who may be going through a familiar season in our wake.

We need each other, whether we want to admit that truth or not. We aren’t Super Woman, or Wonder Woman, or any other super human woman. We are flesh and blood women who sometimes need a good friend to talk to.

My epiphany? I refuse to feel guilty for enjoying my first month of freedom. I will write, and do everything I’ve planned to do and more. I choose to believe God has given me this season to make my dreams come true and enjoy my family and friends. Can anyone relate?